Wedding Gift-Giving
Guidelines
by Susan Kurth
Clot de Broissia
Whether you're planning a wedding, or attending
one, gift-giving plays an important role in the "big day."
We've compiled a list of guidelines to
help answer some questions on this part of the wedding process.
FOR THE WEDDING
GUEST
So you've been invited to a wedding? Are
you wondering what to do about the somewhat obligatory gift?
Most brides and grooms have registered their gift wish list with
a local department or specialty store. Does this mean you must
select from this list? Not necessarily. While it is nice to help
the couple complete their flatware selection or informal place
settings, remember that a unique gift can be just as welcomed.
With the convenience of shopping online, you can now purchase,
gift wrap, enclose a personalized gift card and ship a gift to
the couple without leaving your home or office.
Some things to keep in mind:
- Do not take a gift to the reception. You
cannot be guaranteed that the bride and groom will ever see the
gift, as there is generally no security at the reception (with
the possible exception being if the reception is at the home
of the couple or a family member). Gifts can easily be damaged
or misplaced. Remember, the last thing on the couple's mind that
night will be gathering up gifts. It could easily be left behind.
Send the gift to the address on the registry or the RSVP address
on the wedding invitation.
- Etiquette says that it is a nice gesture
to send a gift whether or not you plan on attending.
Netique offers a variety of memorable gift choices
to give the wedding couple, including picnic
baskets, serving trays, crystal and silver
items.
FOR THE COUPLE:
Planning a wedding can be a very time-consuming
process. If you're like most couples today, you both work full-time,
leaving little time during the week to complete the many details.
Fortunately, with the explosion of the Web, many excellent resources
are now available online to help you to plan your big day. You
can gather ideas for your ceremony and reception, locate local
vendors, read tips from those who have been there, register your
gift wish list, and purchase gifts for your wedding party.
Giving a token of appreciation to bridesmaids,
ushers, groomsmen, and others who have taken a role in the wedding
planning process has long been a custom. Afterall, these individuals
are generally close friends or family members who have given
of their time to help make your day special. And taking part
in a wedding generally comes with financial responsibilities
with the purchase or rental of wedding attire, throwing bridal
showers and bachelor/bachelorette parties, and travel expenses.
Giving gifts to members of the wedding
party is left to the discretion of each couple. There are no
set standards on the cost of the gift, nor do all gifts have
to be the same. Below are some guidelines to help you decide
what is most appropriate for your situation.
WHO SHOULD RECEIVE A GIFT?
The Bride and Groom - One of the oldest wedding-gift traditions is
the exchange of gifts between the bride and the groom. While
this custom is followed by many couples, it is not mandatory.
But why not give each other something that reflects your commitment?
It's best to find something that is lasting, and if appropriate,
engrave it with each of your initials and your wedding date.
Ideas:
A picture frame, a poem, an elegant
desk clock, a collectible,
jewelry.
Parents - One of the more recent customs is to give a
gift to your parents as a token of appreciation for all they
have done in raising you - and to symbolize your continued ties
even though you are now starting your own family.
Ideas:
A nicely framed photo from the wedding, a letter expressing your
gratitude, an engravable bowl.
Maid of Honor/Bridesmaids - These are the women who will
be helping you with the wedding planning and the actual day.
They'll throw showers/parties for you, take you out to lunch
to relax, pick up your dress from the seamstress, etc. They'll
also most likely be the ones to buy those dresses and dyed shoes
that they'll wear only once. So it is nice to thank them with
a small memento. The Maid of Honor generally receives a gift
of greater value, but this is not mandatory.
Ideas: Bud vases, photo frames
or albums, bath oils, crystal bowls, gift
baskets, Limoges boxes or other
collectibles, key chains, clocks, some
part of their wedding attire (hair clips, jewelry).
Best Man/Groomsmen/Ushers - These are the guys who will
throw the bachelor party, help you with your tuxedo, help with
honeymoon arrangements, walk family and friends to their seats
during the ceremony, etc. They may travel a long distance to
make the wedding, and will most likely rent their tuxedo to match
the rest of the wedding party. It is therefore a nice gesture
to thank them with a small gift. The Best Man generally receives
a gift of greater value, but this is not mandatory.
Ideas: Desk clocks, business
card holders, photo frames, key chains, pocket
watches,
high quality pens/pen sets.
Flowergirl(s)/Ring Bearer(s) - These children add a sweet
touch to your wedding ceremony and they are thrilled to be a
part of such a grand event. While they generally do not play
a large part in the planning aspects of the wedding, they do
often spend a lot of time practicing for their "big and
important role" in your wedding. It is generally customary
to give them a small token of appreciation to commemorate their
role in your wedding day.
Ideas:
A framed photo of him/her with you on your wedding day, a small
collectible (figurine, box, bowl, etc.), a small item of jewelry,
a stuffed animal, a hair clip.
Anyone who plays a special part in your wedding - Do you
have a special uncle who walked you down the aisle, or a friend
who sang a solo during your ceremony? Anyone who does something
that you find especially touching should receive a token of appreciation.
Ideas:
A note expressing your appreciation or a framed
photo from the wedding
SIZE OF THE WEDDING PARTY
If you will be having a large wedding party,
it is oftentimes a better idea to choose two gifts - one for
the males and one for the females - and buy them in bulk. This
helps keep costs down (large weddings can be expensive!) and
helps save time. Clocks, pens, key rings and photo frames all
make elegant statements and can be easily personalized with engraving.
For smaller wedding parties, you may opt
to select more personalized gifts for each member of the wedding.
Tickets to a local sporting event are great for the sports fan,
while a bottle of a good vintage wine would be more appropriate
for the wine connoisseur. Generally these people will have played
very active roles in your wedding planning, since they number
fewer than in a larger wedding party. Why not recognize their
roles with individualized gifts?
COST OF GIFTS
Couples on a budget need not worry about
breaking the bank when purchasing gifts for their wedding party.
The cost of the gifts is dictated by what the couple can afford.
The adage "It's the thought that counts" holds true
here. A little creativity and thoughtfulness can go a long way.
Write a poem that expresses how you feel about the individual.
Do they like outdoor events? Offer to take them camping - drive
and bring the food. Other ideas include creative gift baskets,
small vases, clocks, and spa items (bath oils, soaps, etc.).
Whatever you chose to do, all gifts for bridesmaids should be
of equal value, all gifts for groomsmen should be of equal value,
etc., whenever possible.
PRESENTATION OF THE GIFTS
Presentation of a gift is almost as important
as the gift itself. First, be sure to enclose a short, personalized
note thanking the individual for the important role he or she
played in your wedding and mention any details that you especially
appreciated. Second, be sure to elegantly wrap the gift. Nice
paper, bows, and tissue paper help to make a nice gift even more
charming. Some couples opt to incorporate the wedding colors
into the gift wrap, tissues and bows.
When should you give your wedding party
their gifts? Generally, couples prefer to present the gifts at
the rehearsal dinner because of the intimate setting with your
family and closest friends. Other appropriate times include a
small gathering or party for your wedding party the week before
the wedding, or in a private setting where you can express your
gratitude to each participant individually.
Giving a gift of appreciation does not
have to be time consuming or expensive. Afterall, you have many
important details to attend to. The Netique Gift Boutique is
available to help you select the perfect gifts for your wedding
party. We will be happy to work with you on engraving and the
selection of giftwrap. See our selection of gifts for bridesmaids
and groomsmen.
Some of our most popular gifts for members
of the wedding party include:
This article may be reprinted,
provided the following notice is used on the same page as the
article:
This article has been reprinted with permission
of the copyright owner,
Netique.com, which
offers unique and elegant gifts, as well as gift-giving suggestions,
for holidays and special occasions.
This page is part of the Netique®
Gift Boutique.
We make gift-giving
effortless! We giftwrap, prepare your personalized enclosure
card and ship.
To visit the Netique Home Page,
click here.
Netique, Ltd.
819 Monroe Street
Herndon, VA
(703)689-3700
Fax(703)689-3703
e-mail webmaster@netique.com
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